Please don't defend me in public.

  • Posted on: 16 September 2011
  • By: MeiLin

I blame myself for this one.

I have literally been waiting for a year for a written bad review for "Lovers and Beloveds." Yesterday it finally touched down. It was polite, to the point, impersonal, and largely based on a dislike of my writing style. I thanked the reviewer for taking the time to both finish a book she didn't like and also to write out the review; there's nothing worse than someone giving your book two stars and not telling you why.

Stupidly I linked to it on Twitter and let the review comment feed onto my FB page. I noted that I wasn't upset--because honestly, I'm not. Really. When you get a bad review there's always that initial rush of dizzying fight-or-flight adrenaline, but it fades quickly. I'm fine. I wasn't pointing to it because it was a bad review, I was pointing to it because it was the FIRST bad review, the one I've said repeatedly was lurking out there like the Nemesis asteroid or Bruce the Shark, and here it finally was!


People apparently took it upon themselves to defend me, which was unnecessary. She didn't attack me. I don't know what they said because the OP deleted them (and will keep deleting them with 100% of my support). I have apologized to the OP, deleted both pointers, and am horrifically embarrassed. Lesson learned.

I will reiterate this again (and again): PLEASE don't defend me either here or elsewhere. I can deal with it. It embarrasses me when you go off on people, especially people who didn't attack me personally in what they've said about my work. I love you for caring that much, but seriously, it does me more harm than good. I keep forgetting that I have a fan base that will do that in places other than here.

If you have to say something about a negative review or comment, just send it to me personally. Don't post it. Please. Just--don't.

That said, this one was my fault.


Tigger's picture


I didn't post to the person you mentioned yesterday, because I saw you ask us not to...and it wasn't in "your" space, so I wouldn't have anyways. What she said was politely written and non-attacking.

I'm afraid I am one to blame for defending you here. I didn't realize it bothered you that much. I promise to do my best not to defend you. Smile I sorry, Mei!

MeiLin's picture

Most High

I love you for caring. It's just that when people express a differing opinion and get jumped on it tends to dampen not encourage conversation.

Pikachu42's picture


I will refrain from biting people's heads off. Smile Though the silver lining is that you got the bad review out of the way. Now the rest of the good reviews can continue pouring in as they should. Smile

Amy's picture


is non threatening, and there is nothing that is causing any real alarm; why would I weigh in?

A polite differing of opinion should never be cause for the start of a war.

Now, if the commentator had been rude, or threatening you in some fashion or another, then I would be sorely tempted to plant my big ol 3x self firmly in front of you and shield you until you decided how you wanted it dealt with..

so far as I'm concerned the one under attack gets to decide just how they want me to defend them.

I'm glad that the bad review was a kind one though.

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