care and feeding of bi-polar
I'm terribly sorry to bother everyone but I need to beg a little help. Especially from other BP's.
I'm having a really bad low right now and I need some advice on dealing with it. More than just music, I need something to really distract me from the way I feel right now. I'm seeing my dr next week but I need some way other than counting the hours until my sppointment to pass the time. I get the really sucky disphoria where everything sucks and I hate myself and everything I do is terrible and I start sounding like an overwrought teenager dying of extreme agnst. And I hate that too.
And I get really stressed and anxious and find pain to be stress-relieving which can be dangerous. Just to assure everyone I don't ever cut myself or anything like that... but I will bite or punch myself... I have too much of a control thing to do anything that I deem TMD(too much dramma), or that would get me "caught", but I'm definately not in a good place right now. I need something to do and it's raining so I can't mow or jog or walk the dog or do something physical, and I'm in a high anxiety-phase so I can't be touched (which sucks because sex would be very stress-releiving in a good way) but I need something to do and I appologise for the ramblyness and such.