At wit's end
This probably doesn't belong on this forum, but I need to get it off my chest and I don't think just writing it down is quite going to do it. Sorry, this is probably going to wander a bit.
I've about had it with my hubby. He's in the army; he provides for us and I love him dearly, but it seems he does that absolute bare minimum to provide. He's an e4 and on the promotion list, but to get promoted he needs points. To get points he has to do what the army calls correspondence courses. What does he do? He looks at me. 'Hey, WE need to get these done so I can get promoted.' Yeah...we? Means Me. Not him, doing his own work so he can get promoted so he can switch to the job he wants, but me his wife.
His day: Gets up damn early and goes to PT. Comes back, either naps or eats or plays eve. Goes to work at nine. Comes home, plays eve. Eats at the desk while playing Eve. Expects me to play Eve with him. Goes to bed 'round midnight.
My day: Get up when the kids wake up. Feed 'em, change 'em, play with 'em. At some point I'm expected to clean the house, do all the laundry for four people, take care of the finances, clean the house after the kids get done with it before he gets home, and make dinner. Oh yeah, my kids are 10 months and 2 years. Now I'm also expected to do his correspondence work, which takes HOURS for me because I know NOTHING about the material. No army training, doncha know. Oh, and he calls me randomly from work to get on eve and take care of something he forgot to do in the five hours he was playing the night before.
I've learned in our almost 3 years of marriage that my husband is selfish. The day I went into labor with our firstborn, he wanted to drive both of us 2 hours away so he could get a new computer. When the car needed work, I dropped it off and walked home, then walked back to post to pick it up. (He was off that day.) Whenever I want to go somewhere and do something, the moment we get in the car he gets a headache and I get a huge guilt trip. And God forbid I ever contradict him--that's disrespectful. (He doesn't ALWAYS say that outright...) I dropped him off a couple of blocks away from his workplace so he could do some stuff and then took my kids to the store because it was over a hundred degrees in the car. He had to walk to work from where I dropped him off. I received an e-mail later that day telling me I was self-centered.
All of the above is about 'I want' or 'I don't want.' He doesn't want to do the course work because 'his brain is fried after work and he just wants to relax.' He had to get a new computer the day after our daughter was born because he was bored. Nevermind the fact that I was stuck in the hospital, and we'd just moved and there was a crapload of unpacking to do still. (I did all of it cuz he didn't wanna.)
-sigh- I'll quit ranting. I really do love my husband and I appreciate that he does provide for us, but I wish he'd grow up! And I have no clue how to help him cuz I can't be his nanny/servant/whatever. :?